Somewhere at Kettler iceplex...
Coach: OKAY MEN BRING IT IN!!!
(They bring it in)
Coach: Okay, men, welcome back to practice! I'm looking at you especially Osh, hope your two dislocated knee caps are doing ok?
Osh: Its fine coach.
Coach: Good! Okay, lets see here, time to get down to business. Backstrom is that marijuana I smell?!?!
Backy: Nahh coach, just air freshener! (he giggles)
Coach: Fine, now men, what we have in front of ourselves is a great opportunity! We finally have a shot at those pesky penguins, now who's with me?!
(crickets)
Ov: Uhhh coach, we always lose to penguin team, everybody know this.
Coach: DAMMITTT SON WE NEED TO BE KILLERS!!!
Backy: (while coughing a cloud of smoke) This guy sucks brah..
(A dark cloud descends on the practice)
(A door opens and Ted the hutt slithers out from the space cruiser)
Ted: ahhahshshshsss trottzzzkeey, my faithfulll servant!!!
Coach: Oh no you guys the boss is here?!?! Oh Ted how must I serve you my master?!
Ted: bringgg me the blood of crosby!
Coach: You hear that willy? Its go time!
Backy: This is some fucked up shit right here.
Ov: Yes, ov agree with swede brother.
Osh: How fucking long have you two been here?
Ov: Many year, many year.
Backy: I dunno brah, I've been stoned since 2010...
Ov: Yes, ovechkin too is very high.
Osh: Solid.
(coach returns after ted flys off in his cruiser)
Coach: OKAY GUYS I SAID BRING IT IN!
Everyone: We're already in.
Coach: Good, now listen, I've just had a visit from the bossman. He really wants a win out there tonight, lots of fans getting excited about rocking the red and stuff, so like seriously you guys, please? Just try to score a few goals, really its all I ask.
Ov: We score goal, but then awful defense give up goal.
Defense: That's bullshit!
Ov: See, defense suck coach. They let in goal all the time.
Coach: Enough! We don't need this in fighting! Now willy, can you calm everyone down?
Willy: Next guy that talks goes through me!
(crickets)
Coach: There, that's better thanks, willy, now go play in traffic like a good boy!
Willy: Thanks coach!
(he runs off)
Ov: What a moron.
Backy: (giggles)
Osh: This team is wack yo!
The end..... (or is it) (dun dun dun!)
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